Which one do I use? This one or that? This is another misused term that is so hard to figure out. In my days as a journalist, my editor wielded his pencil like a switchblade, stabbing and slicing my story every place I chose incorrectly.

His face would be red and inflamed as he handed my shredded story back to me. I didn’t like his face when it was red and inflamed. It frightened me. And someday he will become a character in a horror novel.

That is the price you pay for being sloppy. It is a emotion, which I hope, I never feel.  So, quite simply.

That is defining, points directly to, marks the thing you’re referring to.

Which is not defining, adds a tidbit or a fact to the thing you’re referring to.

Which one? That one.